In keeping with my 2023 theme of “Fruition”, I’m proud to share that I was given the opportunity to present the closing plenary keynote for the 20th anniversary End Violence Against Women International Conference alongside Michael last week in Chicago.
Our session was on “Start by believing”. Those of you who have followed me and know my story of being victimized by a stranger in college, know that I was believed every step of the way. But we also understand that is not always the case.
Photo by Scott Williams
Michael and I tasked ourselves with sending the EVAWI attendees home with inspiration, ready to make an impact in their communities. We have given this presentation on my case many times over the years, but I can honestly say I felt as though this one was our best to date.
Standing in front of that room with so many people striving to make a difference for the survivors in their communities was humbling. We are often faced with all the shortcomings and problems that exist within the criminal justice system. And we fully recognize how big of an issue those shortcomings continue to be. So with that in mind, what Michael and I chose to do with our time was show the professionals in that room what can happen when the criminal justice system works the way that it should.
Photo by Scott Williams
Every single person has the inherent ability to overcome trauma—to see themselves as a survivor. What keeps them from doing so are the responses they receive when they disclose abuse—negative reactions from family, friends, law enforcement, and society as a whole. But those responses are exactly what the ‘Start by believing’ campaign works to change.
My 2006 case is statistically insignificant, but I wish that it weren’t. I don’t mean that it’s a statistical rarity only because my attacker is still serving his sentence in prison. It’s rare because every response I received was of belief and support.
Every victim deserves that kind of care. Belief has the power to shape who we become despite what we must overcome.
If the people who filled that room during our closing session heard nothing else, I hope they internalized how vital the work is that they do every single day—that their responses matter.
And if you’re here reading this, I hope you understand that your responses matter. You may not be able to change the world and completely eradicate sexual and gender-based violence. But you do have the power to change a survivor’s entire world when you start by believing.
